The Incredible Hulk reviewed in Hulk-speak:  “Roth get injected with serum…. Smash cars.
Tanks. Only with no trousers. Roth groin area ambiguous. Groin area
look lumpy. Bumpy. Perhaps odd penis. Perhaps odd trousers. Critic …
not sure.”

And a deliberately spoiler-rich review of The Happening:  “I’m offering an alternative: A dozen and a
half of the most mind-bendingly ridiculous elements of the film, which
will enable you to marvel at its anti-genius.” (thanks, Elizabeth!)